What He is Weaving in the Wind

Wind whips wisps of hair 
into eyes blurred by despair; 
gusts grab my pulsing heart. 
Nearly toppling, 
scrambling for safe purchase, 
I scream . . .

DON’T BE AFRAID!
STAND UP,
THROW ROOTS
TO DEEP SOIL,
TWIRL THEM 'ROUND
ALL OBSTACLES—
GO FURTHER DOWN,
FURTHER IN;
WRAP THEM 'ROUND
MY LOVE!

KNOW THAT
I AM HERE
WITH YOU,
AWARE
ACTIVE INSIDE
THE TWISTERS,
WORKING 
MY RESCUE PLAN.

I rise, reach out,
send soul tendrils
into the silence
of rich loam,
plunge them further
into firm foundations,
wait to see
what he’s weaving
in the wind.

Think back: What gusts of wind hit you so forcefully, so unpredictably that you found yourself unsteady? I was walking in the neighborhood last week and felt that very thing. The chaos in our nation and around the world reminds me of such a moment. In addition to tornadoes and cyclones, there are wars and murders. The wind is blowing. That cloud on the horizon is eery. Where can we find that solid ground where our roots can go deep and hold us fast?

I woke up today and found out that overnight a plane crashed while landing at an airport in South Korea, and 179 of 181 passengers died. I always pray fervently when on a plane about to land, and I agree with the Africans on board who clap when we are safely cruising down the runway. The possibility of landing gear not working was only in my imagination, until today!

Last night I cruised my Facebook page and saw a post that told me one of my closest friends, Donna Halbert Harvey, had passed away the day before! The death of someone my own age, someone whose prayers and love I treasured, underlined for me that truth that we never know when life will be over.

Donna Halbert was the first other mk (missionary kid) friend that I made after my family transferred from Congo to Côte d’Ivoire in 1961. We were nine years old then. When we were about 12, I stayed with her several days in Korhogo where she lived. We were both yearning to grow in our relationship with Jesus, and read much of Ezekiel together. This struck us:

But you, son of man, listen to what I say to you. Do not rebel like that rebellious people; open your mouth and eat what I give you.” (Ezek. 2:8 NIV)

Sitting together on her bed, we opened our mouths and asked God to fill them!

While at boarding school we had some misunderstandings. But when she returned to Côte d’Ivoire with her father for a visit after Glenn and I were already serving in mission there, we spent an evening together, reconciled and bonded deeply. Since then we’ve become prayer partners, even though we’ve never been geographically close to each other. Our last exchange was just one month before she died, and she sounded fine in spite of the multiple physical issues she has been dealing with! I did not expect to hear that the healing she hoped for was that she is now in the Joy!

So we enter a new year now, 2025, and wonder what it will be like, what else will happen. The truth is, we cannot know!  Our fears can accumulate: Will that loved one come to know Jesus or stay hardened? Will my immigrant friends be safe here in the U.S.? Will wise people be put in administrative positions in our government? Will the wars in Africa triple down to my beloved Nyarafolo region? What purpose does the Lord still have for me?

I think back to that moment when Donna and I told the Lord that we were ready to be filled by him, to know his words, live them out and speak them. That was 62 years ago and I am ready to be filled again, this time with the meal that he wants to give me in preparation for 2025. He is laying certain Scriptures on my heart:

Not to us, O LORD, not to us! But to your name bring honor, for the sake of your loyal love and faithfulness. 2 Why should the nations say, “Where is their God?” 3 Our God is in heaven! He does whatever he pleases! . . .11 You loyal followers of the LORD, trust in the LORD! He is their deliverer and protector. 12 The LORD takes notice of us, he will bless– he will bless the family of Israel, he will bless the family of Aaron. 13 He will bless his loyal followers, both young and old. (Ps. 115:1-3,11-13 NET)

The world is whirling through space and the winds are blowing. God knows what is going on and he is still the one in charge of where it will go. I am one of the “old” ones following him. He knows that, and pays attention.  All my trust must be in him, our Lord Yahweh who loves us, takes notice of us, and will bless us.

3Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, 5 who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith– of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire– may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9 for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.  (1 Pet. 1:3-9 NIV)

This is a timely reminder that trials will come, and they will prove the quality of our faith. If it is solid, it is a lasting hope, a confidence that actually brings us joy right now! That joy is not because we are happy with what is going on around us. Yes, there will be some good things. But world disasters and grief in our community are reality. So our faith, which is worth more than gold (which is of temporary value), needs to keep focused on the eternal truth that Jesus Christ is not finished! He is still our rescuer, and will return (in his own timing) to completely remake this world. This is who we believe in, and he is real.

Right now, he is still remaking us. Eyes on him, he will empower us to handle the turmoil brought by death, by hurts and disappointments, by catastrophes.

Torrential winds may blow, but rooted in him, we can “wait to see what he’s weaving in the wind!”

That Defining Moment

joy and wonder 
at the audacious miracle 
ripped open a gap  
a window in the curtain 
between dimensions 

because God 
had become human
divinity crunched in a body
out of love
for wretched humanity

an angel looked 
for someone awake
not sleeping 
in this defining moment
and found shepherds

alert night guards
who suddenly saw 
something beyond belief
could it be??
an angel of light

blinding their vision
speaking peace 
to chase away terror
with news of Messiah—
He was just born!!

and heaven
could not stay silent
the rip grew wider
and suddenly
a crowd of angels

was exulting, singing
praises to the Mighty God
King of the Universe
Lover of Earth
his broken creation

joining together
the two dimensions
heaven and earth
God and human
in one small child

the window closed
but baffled shepherds
filled with wonder
pondered what each 
had seen and heard

the spectacle
of heaven’s joy
the message of peace
for everyone
even the lowest rung

they had to see it
for themselves
confirming this truth
and they could not
keep silent either

going home
was not the same
“Do you all know 
what we just saw?
Messiah has been born!”

© Linnea Boese  

The Joy of Living in Light

Before God said, “Let there be 
light!” and there was light, 
God was.  And Jesus was: 
Light of the world, 
uncreated light that was, 
and is, and is to come. 

Within the new Jerusalem
no other light will shine,
for he will reign, and day
and night (light undulating) 
will be redefined.  Forever
will be lit another way.

And I live in this light!
In “now” when sun still
rides the sky and moon 
still swells and shrinks
to mark the months,
my heart knows other rhythms.

The Joy within is lit by fires of
radiance from the Throne,
unending, independent of
rotations, situations.
I ask then, why am I:
too often numb to Joy?

How can my heart turn blind, 
unconscious of that glow?
Why do the ebbtides of
my passion leave me low,
stumbling once again 
in half-light, in dark shadow?

I yearn for understanding that 
goes deeper than my skin, for eyes
that see within and through
to what is real and true.
By Spirit power may I be filled 
with light, within my now!

We light the third candle of Advent and sing “Joy to the world! The Lord has come!” Contemplating the entry of the King of the Universe into human form, beginning as an embryo and growing up through childhood and teen years to manhood, we are overwhelmed by wonder. That is, we feel this impact when we let that truth sink in. But when we just light the candle and sing in what can become a routine celebration, we can miss that joy.

The shepherds heard the angels announce that joy and were amazed. They rushed off to see the reality of the baby wrapped in cloths to keep warm, lying in the trough that had held food for the animals. Wow! It was true! Just as the angels had said! Thrilled, they had to tell everyone they met what they had just seen. Their joy was overflowing. I wonder how many of those they told believed them and took off to see the newborn for themselves. Maybe they just disregarded their joy and their message as a frivolous rumor—as many do today.

Those of us who believe and know the rest of the truth about this King come to rescue us, we can experience the same joy that the shepherds felt. It may feel like we are in the dark of night, living in this world, but the Good News is still good news. And although we were not physically present when Messiah came to earth, we believe. That opens our souls, our spiritual selves, to joy!

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy[!] (1 Pet. 1:8 NIV)

Does that extravagant joy seem elusive? It is indeed hard to experience unless we focus on the gifts we have received from Messiah: forgiveness, redemption (bought out of slavery to the dark), constant guidance and companionship. We respond in love, committing ourselves to walk life with him. When our hearts are aligned with his, aware of his presence and activity, his joy fills us. It did that for the followers of Yahweh in the Old Testament days:

The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy. (Ps. 126:3 NIV)

Yahweh’s light gave joy to those aligned with his principles, the “upright”:

Light shines on the righteous and joy on the upright in heart. (Ps. 97:11 NIV)

Then Jesus came as God in human form. He was the true Message from God, the one who breathed life into the dark world at creation and in his coming to earth:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning. 3 Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4 In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.  (Jn. 1:1 NIV)

And since Jesus is light, we have light that is more than just daily sunshine. It is life that lasts forever. We will never walk in spiritual darkness again!

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” (Jn. 8:12 NIV)

So if we are walking in his light, and coming to know him and love him increasingly by turning our inner eyes to him constantly, we will experience that joy that we long for. The darkness has not overcome his light. We can see clearly, and God himself fills us with all the hope, peace and joy that we are so deeply grateful for as we contemplate the miracle of his coming to us. The Word himself underlined this provision for his people when he prayed to the Father just before he gave his life for us:

“I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. (Jn. 17:13 NIV)

Peter heard that prayer, and passed on great encouragement in the letters he wrote. His words assure us that we can experience this joy when we love him and let him be the focus of our life:

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy (1 Pet. 1:8 NIV)

May our joy overflow so that the world is intrigued and drawn to the Light of the world!

Peace, Good Will! And Yet . . .

The angels sang of peace. 
And yet I struggle 
to remember 
what seems 
so elementary: 
peace has its source 
in you, the Prince of Peace. 

Peace seems to be 
the theme song of
a mocking bird,
just borrowed
and played back,
called out in bland
irrelevance, mere words.

Where is good will
when wars devour
the planet? Even
in your Body
cruel manipulations
of the truth score wounds.
Ill will is out to banish peace.

There is no peace.
At least not in 
the daily scratch
and dig of
selfish, cancered
brokenness.  Bells and tinsel
are meaningless if this is all there is.

If not for you, our hope
would lie abandoned
in the darkness.
But your Light
still shines, and in that
Light we see beyond the now
to the not yet, made perfect with your peace.

Peace is my hope, my
solid confidence 
beyond myself in you:
that you will come 
and call us each by name
to lead us like a flock 
to peace that never ends, shalom,

to living undisturbed
by tranquil streams
where canine teeth 
no longer tear
our hearts apart,
where we are safe and
loved, your Kingdom come.

So now I take this truth
to be my own, my
present living out
of future grace.
Your Kingdom
is alive inside my heart.
Your will be done, dear Prince of Peace!

I wrote this poem 23 years ago! Rumors of war were swirling there in Côte d’Ivoire, but we did not know that nine months later we would find ourselves in lock-down while rebels and government troops fired at each other in the city were we were. Peace did seem elusive. Our hearts raced, prayers rose frantically. The only source of any kind of peace was knowing the Prince of Peace and the truth that he promises Real Peace that cannot be understood.

Why can we not understand it? Because it makes no sense to rest in quiet confidence when you are living in a boiling pot. Doesn’t it seem like the world is in chaos now, too?  Wars are raging around the glbobe, dissension and violence make headlines.

But Jesus said:

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (Jn. 14:27 NIV)

He said this just before he would be arrested and crucified! The world was not peaceful! But Jesus’ disciple John remembered that Jesus had said it right then, and when he wrote his book about Jesus he included it. He knew it was true: Jesus’ peace was inner peace, not peace founded on circumstances. He was giving peace that was based on a secure relationship with a loving God. Then, no matter what would happen, their inner well-being would carry his people through the crises.

The note on that verse in the NET Bible explains it will:  “[Peace] is here a reflection of the Hebrew shalom as a farewell. But Jesus says he leaves peace with his disciples. This should probably be understood ultimately in terms of the indwelling of the Paraclete, the Holy Spirit, who has been the topic of the preceding verses. It is his presence, after Jesus has left the disciples and finally returned to the Father, which will remain with them and comfort them.”

So yes, this is peace that we cannot manufacture. But if we belong to God through the sacrifice that Jesus made, then he lives in us—not in bodily form but through his Spirit.

Then we have true shalom, the Hebrew word for peace. I appreciate this deep explanation of it:

“Basically the OT word for peace, šālôm, means ‘completeness’, ‘soundness’, ‘well-being’. (See BDB.) It is used when one asks of or prays for the welfare of another (Gn. 43:27; Ex. 4:18; Jdg. 19:20), when one is in harmony or concord with another (Jos. 9:15; 1 Ki. 5:12), when one seeks the good of a city or country (Ps. 122:6; Je. 29:7). It may mean material prosperity (Ps. 73:3) or physical safety (Ps. 4:8). But also it may mean spiritual well-being. Such peace is the associate of righteousness and truth, but not of wickedness (Ps. 85:10; Is. 48:18, 22; 57:19–21).[1]

The Nyarafolo word for peace, yanyige, means “coolness.” In that hot tropical climate where the sun beats mercilessly down on you, “coolness” is the beloved opposite of heat. It is the shade that you seek, the cool water that you splash over you and the breeze that brings relief. That has spoken peace to me. When Jesus promises peace, he is promising shelter and relief. The kind that lasts forever is only found in him.

Someday the Prince of Peace will return to make the world whole again, a new creation. Then we will have no more war or dissensions or violence, that world peace we long for!

“Isaiah predicted that when the Messiah arrived, He would be called the “Prince of Peace”—presumably because He would achieve lasting peace over His enemies (Isa 9:6; compare Mic 5:5). At this point, God would destroy weapons in the world as the people ‘beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks’ (Isa 2:4 ESV; Mic 4:3 ESV).”[2]

When that final victory is won, there will be complete peace on earth all around us as well as in us. All will be well! So during this second week of Advent, we contemplate peace and celebrate the Prince of Peace!

[1] F. Foulkes, “Peace,” ed. D. R. W. Wood et al., New Bible Dictionary (Leicester, England; Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1996), 891.

[2] Joshua M. Greever, “Peace,” ed. John D. Barry et al., The Lexham Bible Dictionary (Bellingham, WA: Lexham Press, 2016).

It’s Not Over Yet!

Everything vibrant is going to seed: 
burgundy tufts on the yellowing grass, 
slender filaments lined with beans 
drooping down between withering leaves, 
millet high on the dusty stalks, 
papaya clusters, lemons, limes -- 

all reminders that it is time 
to pass on the treasure of living life, 
to breed a crop of who we are: 
succulent fruit and shade from the heat, 
life-giving grain, soft carpets for feet 
time for the aged to go to seed 

till all is renewed, born again, re-viewed, 
so nothing is lost in the crush of death 
but instead finds hope: it’s not over yet!  
another round of growth and struggle 
while we all wait for the re-creation: 
new earth, new sky, new bodies too 

that will never ever ever die!

When I wrote the above poem I was in the tropical woodland savanna climate in northern Côte d’Ivoire. It was late October. Leaves were dropping from the trees, and even grasses were going to seed. Soon the “winter wind”, the harmattan, would be whooshing down out of the cool Sahara nights. It would strip the trees bare and seed pods would fall. The grasses would dry up and slump over.

Here in Michigan the last colored leaves are being stripped from their branches by high winds. Autumn is getting ready to go to bed; life is ending for certain plants.

That is the picture  of mortality that is underlined in Psalm 90 (attributed to Moses, perhaps coming out of the disastrous reactions of Israel to his lengthy stay on Mt. Sinai). He writes:

3 You return mankind to the dust, saying, “Return, descendants of Adam.” 4 For in Your sight a thousand years are like yesterday that passes by, like a few hours of the night. 5 You end their lives; they sleep. They are like grass that grows in the morning– 6 in the morning it sprouts and grows; by evening it withers and dries up. (Ps. 90:3-6 CSB).

It is intriguing that this Psalm is the first reading assigned three days in a row this week, the First Week of Advent, in the revised common lectionary. Why so much emphasis on the shortness of life, when the theme of this week is hope? The world around us is dark, full of humans who hurt each other and break God’s commands. As a result his anger at their crimes results in punishment, some of it just the reality of the consequences of their evil acts, some of it specifically engineered by the King of the Universe.

For we are consumed by Your anger; we are terrified by Your wrath.You have set our unjust ways before You, our secret sins in the light of Your presence. For all our days ebb away under Your wrath; we end our years like a sigh. Our lives last seventy years or, if we are strong, eighty years. Even the best of them are struggle and sorrow; indeed, they pass quickly and we fly away.  (Ps. 90:7-10 CSB)

So why read this psalm when the theme is supposed to be hope?

It is because of the truth and faithful reliance on God’s goodness that is sandwiched in between the laments. Looking back the psalmist affirms this:

You have been our refuge in every generation. Before the mountains were born, before You gave birth to the earth and the world, from eternity to eternity, You are God.  (Ps. 90:1 CSB)

And looking forward, we know that our God will continue to be our refuge and will listen to our prayers. We look around us in desperation. We look to him, and ask him for the wisdom we need to navigate the swamp:

12 Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts. 13 LORD– how long? Turn and have compassion on Your servants. 14 Satisfy us in the morning with Your faithful love so that we may shout with joy and be glad all our days. 15 Make us rejoice for as many days as You have humbled us, for as many years as we have seen adversity. 16 Let Your work be seen by Your servants, and Your splendor by their children. 17 Let the favor of the Lord our God be on us; establish for us the work of our hands– establish the work of our hands! (Ps. 90:12-17 CSB)

How should we “number our days”? Recognizing our mortality, we must look to our eternal God to make our limited lifespan meaningful. If we experience his compassion, his faithful love, in the morning of each day—or in the morning of our lives—then we find joy. We do not find that kind of deep inner happiness by focusing on ourselves or on the world we live in. No! We find it when we are looking to him, heart-eyes fixed on him. We want to see what he is doing and participate in it, because due to his kind favor to us, we can ask him to “establish the work of our hands!” Work done in line with his purpose, under his supervision and empowered by his love, Is meaningful. Even though we struggle and meet tough stuff along the way, the eternal God who has always been our refuge will listen to the prayer of his servants, his dear ones, and work in and through them. Evening will come, and we look forward to it!

The end-goal of our hope is our confidence that this God is the one who sent his Son to conquer death, rise to life, and prepare the way for us to join him in eternal joy in a brand new world! One of the other readings this week is in Revelation 22, where the Lord God promises that although it seems as though this broken world is lasting forever and those set apart for him are in need of ongoing transformation, he is preparing the New World, a perfect city, for them. He says:

Let the unrighteous go on in unrighteousness; let the filthy go on being made filthy; let the righteous go on in righteousness; and let the holy go on being made holy.” 12 “Look! I am coming quickly, and My reward is with Me to repay each person according to what he has done. 13 I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End. 14 “Blessed are those who wash their robes, so that they may have the right to the tree of life and may enter the city by the gates.  (Rev. 22:11-14 CSB)

There we have a stunning picture of the solid hope that is being made ready for us. The “holy” people are those who are consecrated to God, set apart to follow him and serve him. What do they need? Ongoing submission to the work of God’s Spirit in their lives, the one who is changing them to become like him! “Don’t give up, “he says. “Just be sure to focus on what matters. Accept my forgiveness (I wash your robes!) and my promise of life that will last forever with me, the one who is before everything and after everything: the Eternal One!”

We don’t know when Jesus will return, but we do know where we are to focus our hope, and someday we will arrive at the destination that is waiting for us! For now, knowing that eternal death has been conquered by our Master, we just keep on doing each day what he gives us to do. When done for him, it matters:

56 Now the sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ! 58 Therefore, my dear brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always excelling in the Lord’s work, knowing that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. (1 Cor. 15:56-58 CSB)

Because of You I Run with Joy

Sleep may slip out of reach, 
but I will rest in you. 
Age may take its toll, 
but I am renewed by you. 

I may hobble along the path, 
but you will keep me upright. 
I may wrestle with fear in the dark, 
but you are the light in my heart. 

The world’s disasters may trouble me, 
but I will find peace with you. 
Tangled emotions may strangle me,  
but you will pull me through. 

You hold my hand to guide me 
and keep me walking strong, 
you shade me from the burning heat 
and slake my thirst with love. 

If not for you I’d be a mess, 
crippled, fried and lost. 
Because of you I run with joy 
to the goal: forever with you!

Tomorrow is wonderful: a day for focus on giving thanks! There is one item at the top of my list: God my Father, Rescuer and Counselor!

He called me when I was a child and molded me as I grew up, continuing to do it all my life. He does that with each of us who give ourselves to him, acknowledging him as our Master—even when we pull back from time to time. He kindly waits for us to return to him, holding out his welcoming arms. Think of the dad in Jesus’ parable about the son who ran off to do his own thing, but eventually came home destitute (Luke 15:11-32); his father was waiting for him and ran to embrace him. That is what my Father did for me when I was still vacillating. I decided to stay with him forever. Then he showed me the path that he had for me, not all at once, but step by step, in his timing.

Looking back, I can understand much more about how he cared for me through thick and thin.

So now, getting ready to give thanks with special emphasis tomorrow, I will take time to list key moments and sweet little gestures by which God demonstrated his protection, guidance, provision and formation of his daughter. Will you join the chorus that will be raised all across this country and beyond by other sons and daughters?

Instead of taking up your time by writing a long essay for this key holiday, I will just share a song that keeps flitting into my “inner jukebox” every day this week. Lately there have been some tough moments, and it has lifted me. When I looked up the story behind it I was wowed. May it inspire you too!

“In 1978, a young seminary graduate named Henry Smith was struggling to find work and coming to terms with a degenerative eye condition that would eventually leave him legally blind. Despite those hardships, Henry found hope in 2 Corinthians 8:9 and penned “Give Thanks,” one of the most beloved songs of our time.”[1]

Give thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the Holy one,
Give thanks because He’s given,
Jesus Christ His Son.

And now,
Let the weak say I am strong.
Let the poor say I am rich.
Because of what,
The Lord has done for us.
Give thanks.[2]


[1] https://www.praisecharts.com/blog/the-story-behind-the-song-give-thanks/

[2] https://st-takla.org/Lyrics-Spiritual-Songs/English-Coptic-Hymns-Texts/3-Christian-n-Gospel-Lyrics-E-F-G/Give-Thanks.html

Eyes on You

When even the sunrise 
is muted by gray, 
the air polluted 
and blackened by carbon, 
there is one place 
where I can play, 
breathing in air 
that is free from dirt, 
a place where my heart-hurts 
fade away— 
here beside you, 
finding a way 
to gradually lay 
each major worry, 
each broken hope 
on the palms of your hands.
 
You stretch them out,
your arms of power
with soft healing balm
poured onto me,
gently soothing
my fractured thoughts,
transforming them into
firm understanding
that all my hope
is truly in you.
You are my judge,
and their judge too;
I cannot see the ultimate scope
of what you are planning,
of what you will do.

I breathe your air.
There is no dark
pollution here.
And you will help me
persevere, eyes on you
and the final goal,
when you make all things
whole.

When I opened the door to venture out into the predawn air this morning, rain was sprinkling everything and the sun was struggling to send at least some light through the clouds. I walked, thinking about the words that Jesus has been underlining for me:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Heb. 12:1,2 NIV)

That challenge comes right after Hebrews 11 with its review of characters in Scripture that model faith for us. Now, the race is ours!

The Word does not tell us that it will be easy, like a vacation run on the beach in bright sunlight. Instead it warns us that first we have to get rid of whatever might slow us down or even make us trip and fall. That could be distractions. It could be addictions. It might even be gluttony—eating more than we need, or longing constantly for what we think might satisfy us. It might be doing what we know is against the race rules.

Instead, we are to fix our eyes on Jesus.  When we do that, it is like breathing fresh pure air in spite of the smog that might be surrounding us in this world. Looking at him and listening to his plans for us, contemplating his preparation of eternal joy, we can find solid hope that is way more than just wishful thinking. He himself had his heart fixed on that joy of completing his kingdom’s sovereign rule, so he endured the cross. The cross was brutal suffering, but it was suffering he he knew was necessary for accomplishing his purpose for us. So he did it. He offered his body to the spitters, the beaters, the hammers and the nails of shameful murder. It was excruciating, but he did it. And as a result he opened the way for us to be made new, to join the race-runners:  he came back to life and reigns forever!

He is our hero, our example. When we take our focus off the darkness of the world we live in and turn our eyes toward him, gluing them in place, we know that he will see us through to that end goal: joy! We cannot get there on our own. We need our coach, the one guiding us through the turning points, the storms, the smoke and the ruts in the road. Breathing his pure air—his Spirit within us—we have health and stamina to keep running the race. Without his presence we are just not strong enough. Resting our thoughts in his love, we can navigate through the pollution that wants to contaminate all our thinking and turn our eyes away from him.

This enduring relationship gives us soul freedom, a safe place to pray, to play his game and praise his name: Yeshua my Rescuer, Jesus!

Desperate to Center

Thoughts slip left and right, 
up and down, 
circling center 
but not resting there. 

I long to be centered, 
focused, listening. 
When swirling slows 
I sense You here, present. 

That is the heart position 
that centers thoughts 
on You, the Unseen One 
who matters most. 

I rest, absorbing peace
from the Prince of Peace,
the object of my quest:
Jesus! I am blessed.

What I long for is to be able to live like this:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Heb. 12:1-3 NIV)

I am tempted to lose heart. I am tempted to focus on chaos in the world around me. Grief for the choices of loved ones wants to suffocate hope.

But when I turn to Jesus, contemplating his character and his willingness to be attacked, shamed, tortured, and murdered, all for me and the billions of others like me, I find hope again. He was looking beyond the hard things to “the joy set before him.” What was that joy? Providing rescue for the broken and enslaved! Setting up a kingdom of love that will last forever! Creating a worldwide Family of loved ones who choose to be a part of it!

My problem is that the distractions take over all too easily.

So this year I have returned  off and on to a practice I was using during a difficult time while we were over in Côte d’Ivoire: centering prayer. I have never mastered it, but I find it helpful. I  had read Pennington’s book, Centering Prayer: Reviewing an Ancient Christian Prayer Form, and reviewed the helpful points in Adele Ahlberg Calhoun’s Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices that Transform Us. Both pointed out key reasons this practice is worth the effort.

This expresses the key reason:

“Centering prayer is an opening, a response, a putting aside of all the debris that stands in the way of our being totally present to the present Lord, so that he can be present to us.”[1]

There it is: becoming completely aware of being in the Lord’s presence is wonderful, but it is hard to calm all the distracting thoughts that intrude. This kind of prayer is not about intercession. It is about resting, being quiet, focusing on the Person who lives in us. The Holy Spirit is given to us and lives in us, so that we are united with Christ, connected to God in an intensely intimate way. We deal, however, with life in this world with all of its distractions. Fixing our eyes on Jesus is something we are to live out with endurance like his, following him. Keeping our eyes fixed on him is a challenge.

“The purity of Centering Prayer lies in this: for once, both eyes are on God.”[2]  It is “ not production-oriented but rather . . . the simple enjoyment of God, the reality for which he made us.”[3]

And once we experience that, it helps us to maintain that orientation the rest of the day:  walking with our Shepherd, more aware of his guidance and his work.

The steps sound simple, but I have found them challenging. You start by choosing a  “word” or phrase to contemplate. It can be a name of God, or one of his characteristics. You find a position that allows you to pay attention and focus. When thoughts slip in and take over, return to your chosen “word” and wait in his presence.

In the past I used my quiet spot, sitting, wherever I was—like in a chair under the golden rain tree (see the photo above), in Ferke. This week I have tried using my morning walk as a protected space. The words that have led me to a renewed sense of being centered on my God were these, tried on different days: Lord Jesus have mercy on us. Mercy. Compassion. Jesus! God is love. Love!

The intruding thoughts are unavoidable. I am learning to hand them over to my Companion and return to the word(s) in focus. I come home far more relaxed and at peace. God is with me, always, yes!

So in this time with turmoil all around, I would encourage you to contemplate the wonder of our union with our Lord, fixing your eyes on Jesus, who made it possible for us to do this faith walk, to not get so tired that we “lose heart” and forget about the joy set before us.

And, as Adele Calhoun, adds, “throughout your day return to your word and remind the Lord of your love for him.”[4] This helps us to put into practice that great commandment:

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. (Deut. 6:5 NIV)

It will also prepare us to live out the other one that Jesus said is like it:

Love your neighbor as yourself. (Mat 22.39 NIV)

We contemplate our Lord, Father, Savior, Shepherd, who is love and is our source of peace. We get to know him yet better. We long to be like him, and to work with him and for him. The change we long for will come.

“In centering prayer the goal is to so dwell in Christ that the fruit of this dwelling begins to show up in your life. Centering praying may ‘do nothing’ at the moment. You sense no rapture, no mystical bliss. But later, as you move out into the busyness of life, you begin to notice that something has shifted. Your quiet center in Christ holds.”[5]

I am still learning, and I’m enjoying the learning curve!

[1] Pennington, M. Basil. Centering Prayer: Renewing an Ancient Christian Prayer Form. (New York, New York: Doubleday, 1980) p. 86.

[2] Ibid., p. 105.

[3] Ibid. p. 107.

[4] Calhoun, Adele Ahlberg. Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices that Transform Us. (Downers Grove, Illinois: IVP Books, 2005),p. 210.

[5] Ibid., p. 208.

When Peace is Elusive

We yearn for peace but turn away 
from the one certain source that will not die,
	a fifth dimension of hope
	that is founded on truth.
It is transparent reality, not wishful thinking,
	but cannot be seen
	by cataract-laced eyes;
it is only even partly known by those
	committed to the Great Beyond
	while in the Here and Now--

That is, until the surgery is done
that cleans the inner vision, cuts away
	the barriers to knowing,
	even to vital feeling.
We need that intervention to be whole,
	to help make peace
	that dissolves anger
and streams light into the shadowed world.
	Please come! Free all the slaves
	from chains they do not see!

When I wrote this poem a decade ago I was dealing with chaos across the ocean where I lived. Now we are living in chaotic times right here in the U.S. It is not easy to find peace that is not just a superficial “everything will be all right!” What is that “fifth dimension of hope?”

There is just one place to find that confidence: when we are in the Presence of God, Sovereign of the Universe. And how do we get there? Through prayer, prayer that receives what he gives us in return:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phil. 4:6,7 NIV)

That is truth. When we are focused on him, pleading but also thanking him for goodness and grace, the God who is love will fill us with a kind of peace that cannot be explained otherwise.

Our problem is our blurry vision that cannot see into that “fifth dimension.”

During the past few months I’ve been noticing that my eyesight is changing:  I can no longer easily read signs while I’m driving, and when I try to read music to play on the piano I’m not sure of some of the symbols until I cock my head and get closer. I had a visit with my ophthalmologist last week and he confirmed that I was experiencing a real change in my vision, and that it is due to cataracts growing too big! I am slated to have surgery to remove them—I can’t wait to see clearly again!

So the imagery of “cataract-laced eyes” is now intensely personal! When I try to keep my heart-eyes focused on that “transparent reality” that is God’s sovereignty, I cannot see clearly due to all the distractions that intrude. Hopes dashed, anxieties simmering, news that absorbs us, misplaced priorities—yes, all those things make it hard to stay thankful and to trust in God’s purposes. How can we get rid of whatever “cataracts” are blurring our vision?

If only I could constantly take the gift that is offered me:

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (1 Pet. 5:7 NIV)

Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken. (Ps. 55:22 NIV)

Do we believe it? Do we receive it? Do we let the LORD, Yahweh, do that surgery that removes the cataracts from our heart-eyes so that we can see clearly, no obstacles blocking our vision? He will hold us fast. He will not let his dear ones “be shaken,” their faith shattered.

So whatever is concerning us in our personal lives or in the world, we just need to come to him and let him take care of it. Then we keep walking forward, seeing more clearly the path laid out for us:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; 6 think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths. (Prov. 3:5,6 CSB))

I memorized that as a child in a translation that rendered the last line, “he will make your paths straight.”  Both versions explain his guidance, his protection from getting lost or stumbling. I stumbled this morning while walking in my neighborhood, thinking too much about these themes of anxiety and peace—as a result I didn’t notice the height of the curb as I moved from the street onto the sidewalk! I was not keeping focused. It underlines for me the importance of keeping in tune with my Guide, listening to his prompts, accepting his warnings. Then even though we may be momentarily distracted, we won’t be seriously injured:

The LORD makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him; 24 though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand. (Ps. 37:23,24 NIV)

Then, as his light streams into this shadowed world, we not only see clearly, we are held by the loving King of Everything!

That One Thing

When I heard him say, “Seek my face,”

my heart skipped a beat like a goat leaping high

to land on a ledge then jump to the top

of a high crag, flat, and shaded by pines

to find him there, his face lit up

by the rising sun.

I wanted to ask him to share with me

some reasons behind all the suffering,

to draw me a map of the road laid out

for the coming days. But standing before him

I suddenly knew that one thing alone

was priority.

So I bowed my heart

and listened.

The fire of his Presence warmed my soul,

the light from his eyes swept clean

the dingy crannies, the hoarded toys,

and I flew like a moth right into that flame

and found it health and life and love,

all dross removed.

To find his face is to be with him,

to know his heart and to rest, assured

that he rules the world and is wholly good,

that his Family is his true delight,

that he knows all about me

yet hugs me close.

Your face, Lord,

I will seek.[1]

“To seek his face” may seem like old-fashioned English, but it isn’t hard to understand. We live in a world of long-distance interconnections like the Internet and phones—I can even call friends in Africa for free, now, using an app! But there is nothing like talking face-to-face with someone right there beside us. Even the whole point of dating websites is to arrange an in-person meet-up. That is how you get to know someone.

But how can we be face-to-face with our God, who is invisible to us in this life?  This is powerful imagery that describes putting energy into actually encountering him spiritually:

 You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face, [Yahweh], do I seek.” (Ps. 27:8 ESV)

 3 Who shall go up to the mountain of Yahweh? Who shall take a stand in his holy place? 4 The clean of hands and pure of heart, whose heart is not set on vanities, who does not swear an oath in order to deceive. 5 Such a one will receive blessing from Yahweh, saving justice from the God of his salvation. 6 Such is the people that seeks him, that seeks your presence, God of Jacob. (Ps. 24:1 NJB)

To “seek his face” is to want to be with him. Yes, he is always with us, he has promised that. But do we pay attention, turning our inner eyes, the focus of our hearts, to him instead of on worthless things?  It is so easy to do the “right” things: go to church, do my work, relax, exercise, sleep. When do we actually spend time in the presence of our God who is also our Shepherd, Father, Rescuer and King? Is it just an occasional encounter, or is it a priority—that “one thing” that makes all the difference?

A song I’ve loved ever since it came out is this one by Rich Mullins:

“Who have I in Heaven but You Jesus?
And what better could I hope to find down here on earth?
I could cross the most distant reaches
Of this world, but I’d just be wasting my time
Cause I’m certain already, I’m sure I’d find

My one thing
You’re my one thing[2]

When we make intimate relationship with the Holy One one’s own life priority, our “one thing,” changes everything. It changes us, inside and out—in our inner being and in our daily life patterns. For one thing, he cleans our inner person, as was discussed here last week. For another thing, it brings fulfillment and joy.

Let’s think about what it means to “know” someone. Deep studies of how the human brain processes this have underlined that this is intensely personal. When we encounter a living person we can get to know them “in the sense that we have experience of him or her, so that we have a ‘feel’ for who he or she is. . . this kind of knowledge permits a sense of the uniqueness of the other . . .it’s mine, personal.”[3]

A first encounter is always rather superficial. But if that person lives with you, and you actually share daily life, as time goes on your understanding of that person gets increasingly deeper. Each experience points out something in their character and their values. When I was dating Glenn, my knowledge of who he is moved from that first impression of an earnest young guy who wanted to talk about birds to the intimate connection that became true love. After three years of that learning, we got married. Now, fifty-one years later, I know him incredibly more than I did then. I can predict his reactions, interpret his movements, act on his behalf in the way I know he would! That comes from sharing life, constantly, in a relationship based on respect and love.

Developing this personal intimacy with God also requires an ongoing relationship, past the initial encounters, into a firmly bonded union that will last forever. How else could Jesus’ life mission be accomplished?

Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.(Jn. 17:3 NIV)

It’s true that we cannot physically see God; this is a spiritual journey. But when we follow Jesus, giving ourselves to him, we get to know God. His Spirit lives in us instructing us as well.

No one has ever seen God, but the one and only Son, who is himself God and is in closest relationship with the Father, has made him known. (Jn. 1:18 NIV)

As we get to know him while we are here on earth, our shared experiences and his wise teaching will deepen our intimacy with him and our understanding of who he is. The Word that he has given us in our language is foundational as we hear his own story, his words, and learn what matters to him. It incites growth and directs us in how to live in his presence. And prayer becomes conversation as we pour out our hearts to him and listen for his response. When we are paying attention, we can notice his actions in our lives and in the world around us. And we learn by copying him—like the way I learned how to cook, welcome guests and comfort hurting people by sharing life with my mom.

But if we don’t talk with a person, don’t listen to them, don’t share life experiences hand-in-hand, we cannot know them well. We may know about them, and like what we know, or wish we understood them. If we let life take over and don’t make them a priority, the relationship is just casual. Even marriages are often like that when the couple each does their own thing, rarely interacting in meaningful ways. Developing intimacy requires investment.

There will be moments when we “leap to a crag” high on a mountain to get close to our Heavenly Father. But he also will accompany us through every moment, as the Shepherd who watches over his sheep. He wants us to know him and he treasures our desire to live life face-to-face with him!

Seek [Yahweh] and his strength; seek his presence continually! (Ps. 105:4 ESV)

————————

[1] Photo credit: Tom Harpootlian. This poem was published as “His Face,” p. 14 in When He Whispers: Learning to Listen on the Journey, by Linnea Boese. Available on Amazon, ChristianBook.com and other sites.

[2] Mullins, Richard. “My One Thing” lyrics. (Capitol CMG Publishing, Universal Music Publishing Group)

[3] McGilchrist, Ianin .The Master and his Emissary: The Divided Brain and the Making of the Western World. (New Haven and London: Yale University Press, 2009 ), p. 95.